Parenting Decoded
Parenting Decoded
74 – How I Stopped Being My Kids' Human ATM (And Started Teaching Money Skills)
Transform your back-to-school shopping from a budget-busting headache to an opportunity for teaching financial responsibility. I share how I went from spending $100 per child on school supplies to $50 while teaching my kids valuable money lessons in the process.
• Set a firm budget before looking at supply lists and commit to not exceeding it
• Give kids their budget in actual cash so they can physically see their spending limits
• Let them keep whatever they don't spend as an incentive to make smart choices
• Apply the same system to clothes shopping to extend the financial learning
• Even reluctant shoppers benefit from learning how to make purchasing decisions
• Generic supplies work just as well as fancy ones for academic success
• Teaching budgeting and financial trade-offs provides lifelong skills
Email me at info@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.
Have a blessed rest of your day!
Welcome to Parenting Decoded, a podcast for practical approaches to parenting. I'm Mary Eschen. Today
Mary Eschen:we're diving into back-to-school budgets. And listen, I'm not here to tell you to make your own glue sticks or anything crazy like that. I'm here to talk about how I went from being a human ATM machine. I'm here to talk about how I went from being a human ATM machine spending $100 per kid on supplies to actually teaching my children about money and spending way less in the process. If you're listening to this while your kids are asking for their third snack of the morning, buckle up. We're going to make this practical and quick.
Mary Eschen:Okay, confession time. I used to be that mom. You know the one, the helicopter parent who saw the teacher's supply list as a personal challenge. Not required, doesn't matter, I was going to support the school and be the most prepared parent ever. Picture this me and my two boys wandering the aisles of Office Depot with our carefully printed lists, new binders, fancy gel pens, those lunch boxes that cost more than my lunch, standing in line with every other parent in town. All of us doing exactly the same thing. Then came the moment of truth at the register Yikes, $100 per kid for school supplies. And here's the kicker. I'm loading all this brand new stuff into my car I'm thinking about perfectly good binders and backpacks and barely used scissors sitting in our junk drawer at home from last year. Something had to change, not just for my wallet, but because I realized I wasn't teaching my kids anything except that mom was a human ATM machine. Sound familiar?
Mary Eschen:The next year I decided to try something different. Instead of my brilliant buy them stuff, I was going to give my kids a budget and let them figure it out. I'll be honest, I was nervous. What if they made bad choices? What if they didn't have what they needed? What if other parents judged our generic folders? But here's what actually happened my kids went from spending without limits to actually understanding that money doesn't grow on trees, and it happened in just one school year. So let me share the three-step system that changed everything for our family.
Mary Eschen:Step one set the number first and stick to it. Before you even look at that supply list, decide your budget. For us, it went from $100 per kid down to $50. Maybe yours is $25, maybe it's $75. The magic isn't in the number. It's in not budging from whatever you choose. Step two make it visual with real cash. This is where it gets interesting. I gave each of my boys $50 in actual cash not a promise of money, not a credit card real bills they could hold. When my youngest wanted those $12 fancy scissors instead of the $3 regular ones, he could see literally how much of his budget that would eat up Suddenly. He's doing math in the store aisle.
Mary Eschen:Step three let them keep what they don't spend. Here's the game changer. I told them whatever they didn't spend they could keep. Want to use last year's perfectly good backpack? Great, that's $30. Back in your pocket. Backpacks were cheaper. Then Found folders for 50 cents instead of $3? You just earned yourself $2.50. My friend's daughter spent $15 on a unicorn pencil case and then realized she only had $35 left of everything else in her budget of $50. Those generic folders suddenly looked really appealing.
Mary Eschen:But here's what I love about this system I'm not the bad guy anymore. I'm not saying no to fancy stuff. They get to decide what matters most to them and fill their carts themselves. Now let's be real. This isn't always smooth sailing. There are definitely some tears in that first year, especially when my younger son realized he couldn't afford both the light-up pencil case and the scented erasers. But you know what he survived and, more importantly, he learned. The next year both my boys started the conversation with Mom.
Mary Eschen:I've been thinking about how to spend my supply money. Smart, smart they use that word. One thing I want to address, though, is clothes shopping. If your kids need school clothes, use the same system. Set a budget and stick to it. I have a friend whose daughter's in high school system set a budget and stick to it. I have a friend whose daughter's in high school and she discovered thrifting once she realized how much further her clothing budget would stretch at second-hand stores. And for those parents thinking but my kid doesn't care about shopping, don't let them off the hook. Learning to make purchasing decisions is a life skill.
Mary Eschen:I took my reluctant shopper son on a one-on-one mall adventure and I got to watch him develop his opinions about fit and style, and it was worth every minute of it. He didn't initially want to go, but he went and he learned Bottom line. Here's what I wish someone had told me earlier. Your kids don't need the fanciest supplies to be successful students. Those $20 gel pens aren't going to improve their grades, but learning to budget, compare prices and make trade-offs those skills will serve them for the rest of their lives. Setting a back-to-school budget isn't about being cheap. It's about being intentional. It's teaching our kids that money is finite. Choices have consequences, and sometimes the generic crayon box works just as well as the name brand one. That's it for today. May your back-to-school be filled with just the right amount of pencils and paper. Until next time, keep decoding parenting one budget at a time. Have a blessed rest of your day.